I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize