well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
