on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
