Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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