the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
