Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
