Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Randomize
