Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
