so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
