I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
