can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
