Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
