Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
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