he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
