Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Randomize
