i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
