Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
