i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
He passed out mid-signature
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
