All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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