He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Randomize
