i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
organizing the empties. That sober.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
