Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Randomize
