sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
