Whod you bang
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
