Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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