literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
They took my balls.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
