well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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