my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
