Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
