Having a random hookup so left but love u
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
