Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
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