She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
