dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
being pregnant is like rehab
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
