So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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