You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
