All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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