Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
