singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
