I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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