After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize