I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize