i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
We have started to decorate penises.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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