the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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