Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
