if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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