u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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