He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize