He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Randomize
