I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Randomize