Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
