She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
nutella sex= disaster
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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